My girlfriend figured out who you are.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
