I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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