is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
