Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
