would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
