nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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