I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize