Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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