So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
