I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
