some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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