would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
how drunk are you?
Several
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
