I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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