Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Swine flu is the new snow day.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
