He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize