I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
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