Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
The uberlube is also flammable
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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