____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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