I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize