I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
