I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
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