Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
