just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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