i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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