i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
This is my gift to your gina
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
