yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Green mimosas i think yes
What a dumb baby whore.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
