Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
