and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
