i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
