need another drink. this is the easiest way
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
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