i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
