She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize
