All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
