when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
