You're completely useless in the revolution.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
