Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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