i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
