his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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