I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
It's official drugs can't kill me
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
