im having a threesome with these popsicles
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
