hotel room ftw
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
