the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
