Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
