What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
