We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize