just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
