try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
