I hope mine doesn't look like that
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
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