Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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