I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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